Wednesday, November 16, 2011

On top of this, Distraction.

So it's been a month and a half since my last post. The one word that describes life right now would be: Stress. It is hard not to put that in all caps, but I don't want you to think I'm yelling at you. It is capitalized. It is big and has fingers reaching into every part of life.

Hard as it has been to shift from doing part-time editing work (from home) and focusing so much on my own writing and spending hours every day just reading whatever it occurred to me to read to (continuing work while) becoming busier than I have ever been (including reading 30+ hours of theory each week and driving 500 miles), I try to focus on the positive each day. I have good people in my life. I have met some new good people. It is nice to be around people who get geeked out about writing, for sure. I wrote one new poem. That's good, right?

Good golly, I miss free time. Free time for me never meant lazing about watching TV. But it meant lazing about getting stuff done. It meant having The Things I Have To Do stretched out over some plains of time where I could watch everything. Now I literally do not have enough hours in the day. Every day I make decisions on what gets cut, on what Does Not Get Done. This is a hard thing. I am more of a perfectionist than I ever realized.

As such, I also continue to tinker with Conspiracies, while also letting anxiety build that next quarter will be busier, and that will likely come to the forefront as well.

(image above by Alessandro Pagani)